Trust God and His Promises to Build Your Family on Solid Ground
Highlights:
Marriage is Hard
Let’s start with being real. Marriage is hard – and don’t let anybody tell you it isn’t.
When we get married, we’re living with an entirely unique-from-us human being. One who has different desires and dreams and habits and yes, sins. And trying to make that union, that partnership, work – is difficult.
You’ll want to set goals and ideals for your marriage. Something to look towards and hold onto when the going gets tough.
And the best place to find that blueprint? Right in the Bible.
Form A Solid Foundation for Marriage
No matter what, my encouragement for you is to not under or over value where you’re at in your relationship.
If you’re struggling, it can get easier.
If you’re doing well, it might get harder. And that might not sound especially encouraging, but listen closely – God is in this!
As you seek to form a solid and firm foundation for your marriage on God and His promises – the hard will get better — and the good?… there might be a difficult season coming up, but you’ll be more prepared for it!
Don’t expect this relationship to be the one that completes you and makes you feel whole. That wasn’t God‘s intention for marriage.
We often learn it the hard way – but our relationship with our husband will go a whole lot smoother when we understand God’s design for marriage.
God’s intention is for us to look to him and his Son to make us whole. To have the Spirit as our guide.
Marriage — A 24/7 Rest of Your Life Deal
Not one of us knows what God’s up to in our lives. You won’t understand the trials or frustrations in any part of life, but it’s especially true in marriage. This relationship is a 24/7 – rest of your life deal!
It’s the one relationship that when it goes sour, it’s possible for you to escape from it – but that “freedom” won’t happen without lots of heartache.
The implications are vast and long-term. It’s probably why our wise God is pretty serious when He says He hates divorce. He’s looking out for us, for our kids…and their kids.
And in as much as marriage (and most of life) won’t be easy….here’s the reality in that — God doesn’t want easy.
So what does He want? He wants our surrender, our obedience – He wants our growth. He wants us growing more into the likeness of His Son – every day. And what a better way to do that than living with another human – every day!
Become Aware
Become aware of your attitude, emotions – your fear, goals, or lack of them. Not in a selfish, all-about-me way – but in a way that reveals truth and your need for God and obedience to His ways.
Become more aware of your spouse and how he’s wired.
Resources:
Episode #1 – The Who, What, and Why of Living Above the Noise
Episode #3 – A Solid Framework for Parenting
Episode #4 – Find Fulfillment in God’s Design For Homemaking
Episode #5 – The Freedom That Comes From Discovering God’s Value For You
Sacred Marriage by Gary Thomas (Affiliate Link*)
Words to Remember:
- “If you want to become more like Jesus, I can’t imagine a better thing to do than to get married. Being married forces you to face some character issues you’d never have to face otherwise.” Sacred Marriage – Gary Thomas
- When we set our standards so high or we look to our marriage (or kids or our perfect house and schedule, or our job) to make us happy – we’re going to be sorely disappointed.
- We’re not striving for perfection in life (because we know it’s impossible) – but – if we place our values and trust in the heart of Christ, loving and serving Him, then we actually can’t choose those responses.
- Marriage takes lots of work over the long haul. But remember, with God as the third strand – the cord won’t easily be broken.
- Marriage perfectly depicts this statement, “Slow growth with long term benefits!”
- God doesn’t promise us a fairytale ending – but we’ve got to trust in God and His word and do the hard work of surrendering to his design.
- We don’t get paid for these home jobs, but we do grow rich in the rewards as we do them for the glory of God.
- If your marriage looks pretty dim in your view, well I hope you’ll find comfort from the fact that your Lord watches over you. Pray. And listen. And seek help where you can.
- Let’s build a better relationship with that man God destined to be your partner for life. And let’s have a bit of fun along the way!
Questions:
- What am I actually giving myself freedom and choices to do that I really shouldn’t?
- What bad habits have I allowed to sneak in in my marriage?
- What actions do I take (or avoid) in marriage that I know in my heart, go against what God wants me to do – that go against the heart of Jesus?
- Now – list out some reminders / verses / quotes to help you instill in your mind that these things aren’t really options any longer?
- Perhaps too often, we focus on the hard stuff and forget to look for the blessings. Now it’s your turn. Make your list of blessings.
- Do you take being a wife as seriously as you take your responsibilities of any other work you do?
- Do you give as much energy to your marriage (or parenting or creating a wonderful beautiful home) as you do to a job you get paid for?
- How do his habits or aspects personality make you feel? Both good and bad.
- When you’re annoyed, can you picture what your husband might be dealing with in his season of life?
- And more importantly – aware of how you respond to what’s caught your attention (in other words, what frustrated or angers you).
- Are you thinking like Jesus and revealing his character by your actions?
- Or are you letting sin get the best of you – giving in to those habits? It’s important to be honest – get right to the core – as it gives us the best results.
- What hit home the most for you?
- What aspects of marriage are your most enjoyable?
- What are your biggest struggles?
If you have something that’s worked in your relationship – could you be a Titus 2 woman and share it here in this space? Or in your circle of friends?
Marriage and choosing to make family your hub can be lonely! We need each other. Reach out and encourage someone today!
Bible Verses Cited:
- “But from the beginning of creation, ‘God made them male and female.’ ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.” Mark 10:6-9
- “Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up! Again, if two lie together, they keep warm, but how can one keep warm alone? And though a man might prevail against one who is alone, two will withstand him—a threefold cord is not quickly broken.” Ecclesiastes 4:9-12
- “Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.” Ephesians 5:25
- “However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.” Ephesians 5:33
- “Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them.” Colossians 3:18-19
- “Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind regard one another as more important than yourselves.” Philippians 2:3
*Affiliate Links: I receive a small compensation when you purchase using the Amazon links provided above.
