Fear Of Planning — It’s A Real Thing!

Are you relieved by this title — or a bit confused?

If you’re a planning ninja, did you even know there’s such a thing as “fear of planning?”

Or do you know this feeling — the one when you’re about to fill out your planner for the week and you’re gripped with panic — the fear that comes from not knowing what to put on your to-do list?

You feel the tension of putting something on the wrong day, risking it won’t get done.  And the sense of failure when things don’t get done — again.

Teleophobia, also spelled “Telophobia,” is the unreasonable and irrational fear of making definite plans and may also extend to the fear of religious rituals, such as weddings, funerals, and Sunday services. It is seemingly related to a fear of losing control and is similar to the fear of confinement or of making commitments. The person feels restricted or tied down by other people’s agendas. 

You might think I’m pulling your leg, but “decidophobia” is also a real term. It’s used to define the “irrational fear of making decisions.”

You can easily see how these phobias can cause a fear of making plans or in my purpose for writing this post — the fear of using a planner.

I know too well what this fear feels like!  After reading these two articles, I realized my husband and I have both of these to a degree. Hard to admit, but still very true.

I’ve always hesitated to move forward in my plans — I know it’s my “hyper-responsible” tendency to want to do the “right” thing!  Of not wanting anything to go wrong in my sphere of responsibility.

My husband and have made some bad decisions, ones we weren’t ready for. And we bombed in our indecision and lack of preparation. Needless to say, those created a fear of making more mistakes. And so…our teleophobia was nurtured.

You can feed your insecurities and fears — or you can seek help and find tools to help you overcome them. I’m reading John Acuff’s Soundtracks book on rewiring your brain to listen to different music. If you deal with any number of soundtracks telling you “You can’t,” I suggest reading his book!

And it’s why I write this post!

I want you to find freedom to make plans and see the growth and productivity that comes from it.

Almost ten years ago, I committed to a year of planning. I created my own “planner challenge” and have come a long way in overcoming my fear of setting things down on paper, of risking not getting them done, or of making the decision to move forward in spite of the full-on fear I wouldn’t succeed is getting easier by the year.

And you know what? After years of living out my planner challenge, it’s gotten much easier to go with the flow and just get things done! Read this post to be encouraged to come up with a personal planner challenge!

If this excites you or gives you hope — learn how thinking through your fear of planning can help you move forward to what matters most in your life. ⤵️

My Year Didn’t Start With A Bang!

We finally got Christmas “put away” in our house while January was coming to a close.  Yes, we took our time!   But circumstances — and wanting to enjoy the twinkling lights after the busyness of Christmas — slowed us w-a-y down as our family and extended family got the virus RSV.  And all I wanted is do was run into the New Year!

I’ve learned to be okay with a slowdown — of plans not going my way.  I try to get the best out of each situation — but it’s taken years to get here! 

The older I get, the more I know the secret to being content. And the trick is knowing I’m not in control.

Our culture tells us to “Be your own boss.” and “You can do anything.”   Yet, you and I know we aren’t really in control of it all.  God is.  We have limitations.  (Sorry to burst your bubble.)

But Don’t Be Discouraged!

Each day you have more control than you want — just not total control!

• You have control over what you add to your to-do list and onto your schedules.  You don’t have to put it all down! Start with the little things you know will help you succeed. Make it win-able!
  
• You have control over how you handle the multitude of responsibilities in your sphere of influence. Your home or life doesn’t have to look like anyone else’s. You be you! Take one small step in an area you want to take control of. Write it down. Really! Go ahead. Make it a goal to get that one thing accomplished this day or week. Then see how it feels. Use that to motivate you on to the next area.
  
• You have control over how you handle what doesn’t go your way.  Make it your aim to be okay with not getting something done. But don’t get lazy! Simply accept the fact that you’re learning and growing each day. Make a half step toward that goal tomorrow. You can do it! I know you can!

Press on!

• Be encouraged by the possibility of finishing a task or goal.
  Push away the fear of failure.
  Imagine it leaving the room.
  Pray for God to give you the strength to persevere.
  
• Get excited to begin the year running.
  I did this when I began my planner challenge.
  I had to picture getting things done.
  I had to stop being afraid to add a task to my planner.
  I got motivated by the idea of completing the challenge. And it worked!
  
• Don’t be afraid to have lots of goals. 
  Create a “brainstorm” list of all the things you’d love to accomplish.
  You can use this later to pick and choose what’s realistic.
  Writing them down helps you realize you aren’t crazy — just creative and human!
  Remember, you were created in God’s image and He’s an awesome God who created the entire universe!
  
• Don’t expect your plan to go exactly the way you pictured when you wrote in those little boxes in your planner!  Really, it’s o-k-a-y!
  Allow for reality and flexibility in your plan.
  Remember that human element you’re dealing with.
  You’re not perfect nor can you perfectly plan for everything that happens in a day or week or year. Take a deep breath in.
  Now exhale all the stress and fear out.
  Give it to God.
  Then move on in faith and peace. Y
  ou can do this!
  One step at a time.

Picture This!

You know how discouraging it is when you have a great plan underway — but then you get sick. Or your cat gets hurt and requires a trip to the vet. Or you get a flat tire. Or the dishwasher backs up just as you were planning to get those thank-you notes written — or clean the closets — or create your business plan! 

Life happens. Ask me how I know! Every one of these happened to me in a week’s time!

But here’s the thing —

• To know what to do every day — you need a plan — and that starts with having goals. 
  
• To turn goals into reality, you have to list out the necessary tasks. 
  
• To get those tasks done, they need to go on a calendar, preferably on a specific week or day! 

But remember this — you will see things get bumped on your schedule.  And often. 

What matters most is how you deal with those bumps! 

Your response when things don’t go your way offers you a hint of what’s important to you. 

It’s important to see what’s really behind your actions. Take time to answer these questions.

“When I’m frustrated with my messed up plan…

• does it reveal that I wanted a perfect schedule over a practical one?” 
• could it be that I want things to go my way and not someone else’s?” 
• is it because I want to be more like _________ than who I am right now?” (Fill in the name of someone you value or even secretly idolize.) 
• maybe I think life should look one way when God wants me to evaluate what’s most important in my life.” (And it might not be that perfect Pinterest bedroom.)

Go Ahead — Plan Anyway

Be flexible.     Don’t stress.        Plan anyway.

Think about the explorers, scientists, and inventors who made headway one day – only to have their plans disrupted the next. 

The key is — it didn’t stop them!

Envisioning a better day — a great life — a healthy relationship will move you forward.  You’re like those explorers. But you’re exploring your own life and where you’re headed.  

Even if it doesn’t turn out exactly how you planned or on your imagined timetable, you are still moving forward.  And that’s so much better than standing still. So stay the course!

Think – Pray – Plan – Do sheets to help you plan your days!

My Planning This Month

I had one goal for the holiday season — to enjoy the month celebrating with family and friends.  It was an unusual year as we clocked in 6 parties in December and had 34 people in our home for our annual New Year’s party. And each party and person was enjoyed to the fullest.  So in the end, it was a win!

Perhaps the reason we value all the possibilities at the start of the year is because we keep so busy with Christmas preparations and activities. When the ball reaches the top of a new year, we’re ready to move into our own life and goals!

I enjoy slowing down the week after the New Year.
To rejuvenate my goals and revisit my planning courses and methods.

My encouragement for you:

➡️ Don’t let the Fear of Planning stop you.

➡️ Failure to meet your goals or “shoulds” is okay. 

➡️ Use what didn’t work to fuel you!

➡️ Look for the Wins.

Because I have yet to find the perfect planner (surprise, surprise!) I’ve taken the time to create my own. It meets my needs and it just might meet yours!

You’ll find it on Amazon later this month! Check back here for the link or search Amazon for the TPPD (Think – Pray – Plan – Do) Planner from Living Above the Noise.

Also, I love the planning pages at the start of each month in Ruth Soukup’s *Living Well Planner. (see above pic)  They encourage me to dream a bit, to set time aside to look at reality and what I want to get done — plus I can review my past months to see how well I did!  (I needed more room to breathe so I created my planner in 8.5″ x 11″ pages.)  

You can find more of my posts on planners and planning here:

Choosing A Planner….So Many Options!
3 Steps To Stop The Chaos…Why You Need A Plan!
School’s Starting! – You Need To Plan For the Perfect Day

I pray your year produces joy and success — in your way and your timing!

The mind of man plans his way, but the Lord directs his steps.  Proverbs 16:9

*Zero pressure to purchase anything, but if you purchase through one of these links, you’ll help to support the work I do here at Living Above The Noise.