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My Struggle to Find Focus — Biblical Truth for a Blogger

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I’ll be honest with you — I’ve been struggling with my blog focus lately.  I’ve wondered if my content is relevant to your needs.  Am I only adding to all the noise on this crazy internet!  Should I write more? Less. Should I quit?!

Times Change – 

A lot has changed since I began blogging nine years ago!  It used to be that bloggers shared their hearts and lives when the mood struck.  Now blogging gurus tell us to post religiously, send newsletters weekly, add to that daily Facebook, Pinterest, and Instagram — basically invade every bit of your world! 

I find that pretty annoying. When bloggers I follow won’t stay out of my inbox for more than a few days, and I’m guessing you do too.  I get tired of being told I need some amazing, incredible, easy, or fast — trick, gadget, schedule, book, or course – in order to be a better person, blogger, mom, wife, plus be instantly rich.  I’m sure you get my drift!  So I won’t add to the racket and I’ll be blogging the way you and I like it!

Ahhhh…. 😊

With 500 million blogs out there — really! 😯 — it’s hard for a blogger to make sure their reader can even find them.

All the to-dos and shoulds of blogging make my follow-the-rules personality a bit crazy! And I just stop writing. But then I remember how much I enjoy making friends on the internet. I know you want to live above the noise And to do that you need to realize your value before God. Then you can love your family well. And actually enjoy being a mom! And I want to help you do just that!

Biblical Truth for a Blogger –

While sorting through my conflicting thoughts, praying, reading, and seeking counsel, I read the book of Titus. I was again reminded that I am the “older woman” Paul speaks of.  Now, I’m not completely thrilled to have earned this title 😊 but it’s where I am in life!  And because of my age and experience, I have a clear calling to meet the Titus 2 commands. 

According to Scripture, older women are to encourage / teach / train younger women to:

– Love their husbands  — love isn’t always easy and we need ideas and help to do this well.
– Love their children  — it can be really hard being a momma!
– Manage / keep their homes — it’s a tough job but it has to be done.

All of this so “that the Word of God may not be dishonored.”

I’m accepting God’s call me for this journey.  I’ll use my gift of writing — my decades spent journaling to capture and chew on thoughts and ideas — to help “younger” women (that’s you!) love the life they’ve been given.   And that includes all the emotional and spiritual digging-in-the-dirt details of how that actually looks in real life. 

I also like this to be a place where “older” women feel comfortable having conversations about life in middle age:  menopause, empty nest, relationships in marriage after the kids are gone, finding purpose, and more.  This season of life can be quite unsettling to navigate.  We all need friends to help smooth the bumps in the road.

Miscellany – 

  • Expect to see me in your inbox a few times a month, more or less as the mood or Spirit strikes. 
  • I’ll link to a few products I think you’ll find useful.  But only things I use and value and hopefully create soon.
  • But mostly — I’m offering you some hard-won wisdom and discernment in the realm of wife-dom, mothering, personal and spiritual encouragement, along with home management and care.

Please reach out if there’s anything I can help with. Anything you’d like to get a conversation started on.  Shoot me an email with encouraging happenings in your life. I’d love to hear from you! Honestly, blogging can be lonely.

Another thing, I’d love it if you’d share my posts with women you care about. 

Thanks for your time.
Blessings and prayers as you seek to live above the noise!

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PS – Check out a few of my favorite finds below!

Older women likewise are to be reverent in their behavior, not malicious gossips nor enslaved to much wine, teaching what is good, so that they may encourage the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, 5to be sensible, pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, so that the word of God will not be dishonored. Titus 2:3-5


Encouragement from Emily Freeman!
If you haven’t discovered her podcasts, you’re in for a treat. 
She’s calm and balanced and just what I need to center me in God’s will!  Enjoy!

How To Organize A Brain Dump
Are you tired of holding your whole to-do list in your head!?
Well, here’s a great post on brainstorming I think you’ll find helpful.

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Fear Of Planning — It’s A Real Thing!

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Guess what?!  There really is such a thing as the fear of planning!  You know that feeling — you want to fill out the next week in your planner but you’re gripped with panic from not knowing what to put on your to-do list.  You feel the apprehension of putting something on a wrong day and risking it won’t get done.  Then what?!

Teleophobia, also spelled “Telophobia,” is the unreasonable and irrational fear of making definite plans and may also extend to the fear of religious rituals, such as weddings, funerals, and Sunday services. It is seemingly related to a fear of losing control and is similar to the fear of confinement or of making commitments. The person feels restricted or tied down by other people’s agendas. 

Oh my, do I know what this fear feels like!  I’ve always been hesitant to move forward in my plans — I guess it’s my “hyper-responsible” tendency always wanting to do the “right” thing!  But by committing to a year of planning, I’m actually overcoming my fear and finding it’s getting easier to go with the flow and just get things done!

My Start Of The Year — It Didn’t Go Off With A Bang!

We’re finally got Christmas “put away” in our house with January winding down!  Yup…we took our time! ;)  But time and circumstances (and still enjoying the twinkling lights!) slowed us w-a-y down as our family and extended family got the virus RSV.  Not a good thing to get sick when all I wanted is do was run into the New Year!

But you know what?  The longer I live, the more I understand the secret to being content — knowing I’m not in control.  So I’m okay with this slowdown and plans not going my way.  I’m learning to get the best out of each situation (it’s taken decades!).  The mantras all around us say, “Be your own boss.” and “No matter what, you can make anything happen.”   Yet, you and I know we aren’t really in control of it all.  God is.  We do have limitations.  (Sorry to burst your bubble.)

Don’t Be Discouraged!

Every day we have way more control than I’m sure we actually like!  But not total control.

  • We have control over what we add to our to-do list and onto our schedules. 
  • We have control over how we handle the multitude of responsibilities in our sphere of influence.   
  • And we have control over how we handle what doesn’t go our way. 

So press on…

  • Be encouraged to get on with it. 
  • Get excited to begin the year running. 
  • Don’t be afraid to have lots of goals. 
  • Just don’t expect it to go exactly the way you expected when you wrote in those little boxes in your planner!  Really, it’s o-k-a-y!

Picture This!

Picture how discouraging it is when you have a great plan underway but then you get sick — or your cat gets hurt and that means a trip to the vet — or you get a flat tire — or the dishwasher backs up just as you were planning to get those thank-you notes written, or clean the closets, or create your business plan!  Life happens.

But here’s the thing —

  • In order to know what to do every day we need a plan, and that starts with having goals. 
  • To turn goals into reality, we have to list out the necessary tasks. 
  • To get those tasks done, they need to go on a calendar, and preferably on a specific week or day! 
  • Here’s the kicker — the reality is this — we will see things get bumped on our schedule.  And often. 

But you know what the really important thing is?  How we deal with those bumps is what matters the most!  My response to things not going my way gives me a hint of what’s really important to me.   (Take time to answer these questions – it’s good for us to see what’s really behind our actions.)

When I’m frustrated with my messed up plan…

  • Is it that I really wanted a perfect schedule over a practical one? 
  • Possibly I just want things to go my way and not anyone else’s? 
  • Could it be that I want to be more like ______ than who I am right now? (You stick in whoever comes to mind that you value or even secretly idolize.) 
  • Maybe I think life should look one way when God really wants me to evaluate what’s most important in life (and it might not be that perfectly Pinterest bedroom ;)

Go Ahead — Plan Anyway

Be flexible.     Don’t stress.        Plan anyway.

Think about all the explorers, scientists, and inventors who made headway one day only to have their plans disrupted the next.  The key is — it didn’t stop them!

Envisioning a better day or life or relationship will move us forward.  We’re like the explorers — we’re just exploring our own life and where we’re headed.  It might not turn out exactly how we planned or perfectly on our timetable, but we are moving forward.  So stay the course!

 

My Planning This Month

I got so busy last month that I missed posting my planner progress.  Yes, I was not organized and let Christmas prep get the best of me!  But I did have one goal — to enjoy the month celebrating with family and friends.  We clocked in 6 parties in December, had 34 people in our home for New Year’s and each party and person was enjoyed to the fullest.  So in the end, it was a win!

My encouragement for you:

Don’t let the Fear of Planning stop you. ~ Failure to meet your goals or “shoulds” is okay.  ~ Use them to Fuel you!   ~ Look for the Wins.

Even though I have yet to find the perfect planner (hah – surprise, surprise!)  I do love the planning pages at the start of each month in Ruth Soukup’s *Living Well Planner. (see above pic)  They encourage me to dream a bit, set time aside to look at reality and what I want to get done, plus I can review my past months to see how well I did!  Highly recommended.  (More posts on planners, here and here.)

So, here’s to the New Year, one that produces joy and success for each one of you, in your own way and your own timing!

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The mind of man plans his way,
            But the LORD directs his steps.  Proverbs 16:9

*Zero pressure from us to purchase anything, but if you make a purchase through one of these links, you will help to support the work we do here at Living Above The Noise.





Planning For God’s Glory—Or Your Own?

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You know—God is amazing!  He works in the little things, but usually, we only notice Him in the big things.  Sad.  Because it’s in the little things where we can be truly faithful and follow His course. 

After getting jazzed about planning this year (and I’m still over-the-top jazzed!) God woke me up last weekend to realize this.   Everything I do—everything you do—is for His glory and in His plan for our lives!

So then, of course, planning would rank pretty high on our lists!  Why?  Because, if you can commit to using all the hours, days, weeks, and years for doing our best for Him (not to get into heaven; I’m not talking about that kind of work!) you’ll know you’re doing the best with the limited time you have.  Exciting isn’t it?!

My tips for you this week:

  • Meditate—take a break here and there from the busy rush of life.
  • Think about what God brings to your mind.
  • Pray.  Pray for wisdom to discern both what you need to do and what you need to stop doing.
  • Then get that planner out and start crossing things off and adding things into each week and day!  It’s the only way you can really know you’re using each moment to do the best you can with what you’ve been given!

So there!  Won’t you join me in using this life for the best God intended it to be?!

He knows just what you need.  Trust.

Blessings this week!

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Whatever you do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through Him to God the Father.  Colossians 3:17





Simple Steps To Gain Sanity Through Planning

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First Things First—Be Willing To Do the Work!

This post has the potential to bring order to your busy life.  You really can gain sanity through planning.  But you have to be prepared to do the work! 

Yikes, maybe that’s not the best start to a post with the word “Simple” in its title!  But, it’s true and I’m not going to fool you.  You and I need to be willing to get past the lazy troll who lives within us and do the tough stuff.  I’m sorry, but it’s just reality!  If you’re new to this topic, you can find my post on why you need a plan in the first place, here.  Now let’s get started!

We all know the chaos that reigns as we get busier and busier in life.  There is just so much to do and not enough time to do it!  But by following these steps, you will see clarity in getting things done — along with what’s really important to you and what’s just fluff on your to-do list.  We get so generic in what we put on our to-do lists that we miss what’s really necessary.  Read through this post, then read it again from your own life perspective in order to really see the picture from a 40,000-foot view of your life.

Remember, the steps are simple, it’s the work that’s hard—but oh, the reward is sweet!

The “How To’s” Of Developing Planning Habits

So here are the simple steps I promised you.  Remember—as we repeat these steps, they’ll get easier, plus we’ll be forming habits to increase our productivity.  And guess what?  You can start this process before you get your planner! 

  1.  Categorize
  2.  Brainstorm
  3.  Add Sub-Tasks
  4.  Ask Questions and Add Details
  5.  Set Due Dates

A lot of people recommend starting with a brainstorm session.  Personally, I find categorizing my areas of responsibility first helps me hone in on the most important areas of my life, rather than lumping them all into one pile.

#1 — Categorize

This is pretty simple.  Categorize your main areas of responsibility:

Home — Family — Work — Self — Finances — Relationships — etc.

#2  Brainstorm

(This section and the next Subtask section go hand-in-hand but the importance of doing both is often missed in most planning tutorials.)  KEY – this isn’t the place to start writing down your specific to-do’s!  Hang in there. 

Under each category heading, brainstorm all areas that need your attention — the ones that drive you crazy and/or are simply your responsibility.  Keep them basic (see example below).  List out any projects, rooms to keep up, events, etc.  **If you over-think and write down all your tasks and to-do’s, it makes it much more difficult when it comes time to decide which task is more important then another.  (Believe me, I’ve done this wrong for years and wondered why my big stuff never got done!)

A lightbulb went off for me when I listened to a webinar by Sue Hollowell, a project manager turned life-coach.  Under each category of responsibility, she recommends using Nouns to describe the things that need your attention.  Think of these as the place or the thing needing attention, not the actual activity or task.  This keeps you focused on the main goal, not getting sidetracked on the details before you have a plan!

Examples:  (remember—use nouns!)

Home:  Bathroom Remodel — Chores — Garden — Clutter — Garage —  etc.

Family:  Homeschool — Birthdays — Vacations — Clothing — etc. 

You can add a “Miscellaneous” heading under each category.  It’s good to have a place to keep track of your less important tasks without taking up prime space under your main categories.

#3  Add Subtasks

Now you’ll add specific tasks under each project and responsibility.  So, start with the project, then add the subtasks to get the job done.   Jeff Goins, author, explains it this way —

“Anytime a task on your to-do list has more than one item on it (requires multiple tasks to get it done), you will get bogged down.” 

Why?  Because that “one task” seems monumental to accomplish!  It’s not clear enough to let you know what it will take to get the job done.  You’ll keep passing over it due to lack of clarity on what should come first.   So you’ll avoid it!  Instead, avoid the overwhelm.  Detail out each responsibility and the job becomes clear!

Here’s another way to picture it.  What if you wrote down, “Sort through closets.”  You’ll think of this job as pretty time intensive.  It will seem overwhelming due to its sheer size.  If you’re like me, you’ll put it off because it’s so foggy in details.

Before you can really plan for a project, each task needs to be broken down into the sub-tasks required to accomplish it.  These are the things you place on your to-do list, NOT the bigger picture projects.  Those stay on the brainstorm list.

Specify each area of responsibility and all the details needed for you to gain the “order” you desire.  Examples:

  • Garage:  buy doormats, sort boxes, sweep, wipe off shelves…
  • Clutter:  put sweaters in totes, go through closets and give away anything that doesn’t fit, organize shoes, dust shelves…
  • Chores:  dust 1/month, vacuum 2x/week, wash windows 2/year…
  • Garden:  water weekly, buy fertilizer, fertilize every other week, weed 1/month, have Bruce get mulch and add 3″ to beds, plant roses…

Do you see how this highlights the time and tools and people needed for a job?  This makes planning so much easier!

#4  Ask Questions And Add Details

Now is the time to ask lots of questions.  The answers will add the necessary details to your list.  Instead of having a foggy idea, you’ll know exactly what it will take to reach your goal.  You may even discover that purchasing a simple tool or not knowing a step is all that’s holding you back!

  • Where do I start?  How much time do I plan for?  (Clean garage 3 hrs. on Saturday – all family needed)
  • In what order does each task need to be done?  List out each step.  (Sweep.  Pressure wash.  Throw out old tools/toys.  Straighten totes on shelves.)
  • When will you need a tool or a person to help?  (Buy new cleaning rags, doormats.  Bruce get pressure washer set up.)

#5  Set Due Dates

Set the desired end date for each goal, project, or activity.  Consider when you want or need to accomplish a goal and choose a due date.  Work around events already on your calendar.  Then work backward from that date on your calendar, portioning out your time and tasks right back to today!

#6  Next & Last Step —  Add Tasks To Your Planner Calendar!

Just do it!  Start adding tasks to those little boxes on your planner.  This seems like such a basic step yet it can feel so difficult to commit to.  We don’t want to put it on the “wrong” day.  We worry something else will come up or  we won’t have enough time to do it.  This century demands busy schedules.  We get mired in the chaos and forget to make a plan.  But we really need a strategy!  Again, just do it!

Begin adding tasks to your weekly schedule.  Choose to treat these tasks like actual appointments you make with yourself.  Act like you would at work — like you’re getting paid for your time and your projects.  Be the CEO of your life!  Once you do, you’ll see this process take a complicated list of tasks and responsibilities and bring order and sanity into your life!

Whew!  We covered a lot!  Read these steps again, picturing your life and responsibilities.  It will begin to make sense.  Then follow the steps in a few areas you want to work on.  But, most importantly —

Don’t Quit!* — You can do this!

*And I really mean don’t quit!  I had to remind myself of this the other day.  I had a plan — a really good one.  But my day was filled with unexpected events.  Think: dog gets hurt and may need a vet visit; son needs to make a last-minute birthday gift order; mother-in-law needs emergency doctor appointment.  You get the picture!

This is life.  Full of unexpected events.  It evolves and changes even though we have a plan. 

Please don’t let that stop you from gaining order.   Adjust as necessary.

And don’t let it stop you from reaching for your goals.  One day at a time!

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The plans of the diligent lead surely to advantage, But everyone who is hasty comes surely to poverty.  Proverbs 21:5
No pressure to purchase anything, but if you make a purchase through one of these links, you will help to support the work I do here at Living Above The Noise. Thanks!