Gain the Confidence To Step Into Your Life With Intention and Trust.
Titus 2 Foundation
If you’ve followed this series, I’ve spent a few posts laying the basic foundation and structure of Titus 2:3-5.
We started learning how to live above the noise. Then we moved on to marriage and loving your husband — parenting and loving your children — and what it takes to be a keeper at home – a homemaker.
But there’s part of the foundation I’d like to set — let’s call it the cornerstone of your life as a woman.
And how important it is for you to discover and embrace your unique identity and value as the woman you are.
God created you not only spiritual but as a flesh and blood human – and He knows you need to live it out daily.
He knows you’ll do that best if you’re healthy and whole and living for Him – while using your personality, strengths, and skills to fulfill your calling as a wife, mom, homemaker, daughter, sister, and friend. And any of the other roles you fulfill in life – you are needed!
But most important is that you’re not going to find your identity and value where you might expect. At least not where the world tells you to find it!
Are You of Value?
You know, from the time we’re young we wonder about our worth. You see it when your kids ask you “Watch me!” or “Hey, look at this!” or “Look what I colored” what seems like a hundred times a day!
So to understand themselves and their world, they really want to know if they’re valued. That they’re worth something? It’s called reinforcement. They’re learning they’re of value — and they are capable.
Now, try hard to remember this when you wake up in the morning — and I’m guessing there are mornings you wake up and wonder if what you’re doing is worth anything.
Is this work you’ll do today valued by anyone?
It might be caring for your home — it could be the curriculum you chose for your homeschool — it could be keeping the fridge stocked and making great meals — or trying to lose weight — or like I am, starting a podcast.
And you wonder – “Is what I’m doing worth it? Am I worth it?
Does God Love Me? Am I Good Enough?
At these times – and they will happen often in your life – it can be really helpful to go back to the very beginning as a Christian…like those children in the early years, confirming that what they’re doing is worthy.
Go back to when you first professed faith in Christ.
You somehow knew you weren’t worthy to go before God – you knew you were a sinner – and you knew you needed to repent.
But then you learned about our amazing God Who loves you so much that He sent his son to die for you.
And you began to see your potential, your worth to Him. You were cared for enough that Jesus suffered for you – to give you a chance at new life!
But then we move forward into life — our roles change and the menial tasks enter in, we discover it’s not all sunshine and roses.
And we sin and complain and forget.
It’s not all the feels of amazing worth — and if we don’t keep our gaze on God, we become like those children again — asking someone to “watch me” or “look what I did… do you like it?”
I’m pretty are that’s why Social media is so popular, don’t you?
Is Self-Care Okay For A Christian?
I’m sure you’ve heard it in Christian circles — that “self-care” should be avoided because, as believers, we’re supposed to serve and consider others before ourselves. And, we might feel a bit guilty if we focus on ourselves. I get it.
The idea of God “valuing us” might sound like reverse worship. And we have no intention of that!
What I’m sharing here is not taking the focus off of God — but allowing Scripture to sink in to show you just how much God loves YOU.
Our goal in life is to look to God and surrender to His design.
And I believe when you see your VALUE from God’s eyes — you can move into the life He’s given you with confidence. Which also helps you live above the noise of the world around you.
I was talking with my pastor the other night – about the idea that the more you know of God, the more you need to tell others. And this is exactly how I feel.
The more I know of God, of what He’s done in my life, the more amazed I am that he loves me. And the more I want you to see that for yourself.
So let’s move onto just how much he values you – and why – and to what purpose!
It’s way bigger than you can imagine!
God Uses You and Your Unique Personality
So let’s look at a few foundational scriptures to see what God says about your value and if you’re worth it — God is clear in His Word about His care and love for you.
He’s also clear about what He wants in return from you — how He wants your devotion and for you to work out your salvation.
He wants you to advance his kingdom — and He does that by using you and your unique personality. And knowing how much God values His creation — that’s you! — will make a huge difference in how you approach your day.
And when you have confidence in your unique design, you can better use your gifts and talents for those around you.
Your husband, children, and friends. Everyone benefits when you get a proper perspective of your value — your design — but you’ve got to start by knowing God’s plan!
I say “Amen” to that!
As you listen, think deeply about where your identity lies – about what you look for in life. Truly.
And think about how you’re allowing God to use you — and your uniqueness — to do His work.
I want you to see this because for years I struggled not knowing I needed a better perspective on who I was and how God created me for His purposes. I spent so much time creating my own purpose.
Resist the Temptation — What Does God Value In You?
You know as well as I do — we live in a world that has us spinning faster every day. There’s more noise online, every day, everywhere.
And it’s really hard to truly stop and resist the temptation to get on the fast track with everyone else.
This got me thinking – wanting more isn’t only a first-world problem like we might imagine.
All the way back to the Egyptian culture we see their desire for beauty and power. The women were as vain as we are today! They designed alluring clothes, jewelry and makeup — did you know they’re recognized as the first to use cosmetics and perfumes?
Fast forward to New Testament times, the women of that era were also finding value in costly jewelry, elaborate hairstyles, and clothing — and God used them to remind us that the “gentle and quiet spirit within us” is what He’s more concerned with.
“Your adornment must not be merely the external—braiding the hair, wearing gold jewelry, or putting on apparel; but it should be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God.” 1 Timothy 2:9-10
I find it interesting that in our present day, this biblical topic isn’t being discussed. Maybe it’s time we did!
Maybe it’s time we each look at the true value of a woman, Your true value given by God. What He considers imperishable and precious.
Of course, we like to feel pretty — but I’ll ask a tough question ⤵️
Are you tempted to find your value decided by a culture full of vanity, marketing, and temptations to get you to buy and do and want more in life?
I’m reminding you, giving you the courage! Be who you were created to be — not by the world’s ideas or your friends or what’s most popular on Pinterest.
Take time to discover what’s best for you and for your family.
Set your focus on God’s design for you.
That’s why I believe discovering your value before God is so foundational to Living Above the Noise!
—> If you’d like a week of encouragement in your inbox, reminding you how you were created by a loving God to do good work — grab my 7-day Devotional on this very topic.
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Questions to Ask
These questions will help set the groundwork for your Titus 2 focus — reclaiming family life – you know… marriage, parenting, and home care!
- What caused you to be and use your unique personality the way you are today?
- What might God want you to shift in your priorities and how you use your time?
- Pay attention to where your focus is OR what’s undergirding it — is there ego or pride at play rather than humility in submission?
I Needed A Perspective Change!
I’ll share a time when I needed to evaluate who I was — one of those opportunities that shifted my focus and perspective.
A long time ago, when my ten kids were still at home, and we’d be out shopping or at church, others would comment, “How do you do it? You must be a saint!”
It always caught me off guard. I wonder why? :)
I wondered and thought about it after I’d heard it — too many times to count — at first thinking that maybe I was special or something. But I knew I was no saint!
All I can guess is that they thought I was following the creation mandate to be fruitful and fill the earth! Or that I had mainly qualities that kept me patient. My kids and I are laughing at that!
Just to let you know — filling the earth was the last thing on my mind!
Saint or Selfish?
After some introspection, I realized what was at the core of my mom-of-many status….I was selfish!
I loved having babies and every time one of them would turn 15 months old or so, I’d pine for another. It was my flesh not wanting to be without something I loved. I wanted more!
And I don’t believe that qualifies as “saint” status!
What I needed was to connect my selfishness with a lack of trust in God’s plan for my life. Was I in control — or God?
Of course, God used my love for babies to create a whole lot of amazing individuals in the world! And He used them to grow me in ways I never would have grown otherwise….but I think you get my point.
Things on the inside aren’t always what they appear to be on the outside!
So, all that to say — it takes some deep thought to see where your heart really lies! To see what you’re using to create your value in life.
And to understand that God wants you to discover your value to Him and in Him!
A New View of God
I share a lot of scripture here — my prayer is for you to see in them – a new view of God you might not have seen before!
In our book and Bible study culture, we can get so focused on learning about God, His Word, and His love for creation — which is obviously those are very important —
But we can easily miss the connection between that amazing Truth and what God has to say about us – about how He feels about His own creation!
We get so busy learning and doing, learning and doing, that we miss our vital role in His plan.
I was raised Catholic and in that era, we were taught more about fearing God than anything else. We were taught to be good — and as a child, that’s mostly what I took away from it.
Here’s a caveat – Don’t just tell your kids to obey because God’s watching! Teach them of His love along with why God wants them to obey!
I didn’t do so well at this in my early years of parenting and being a new Christian.
Aren’t we so glad God is a God of mercy and grace?
There is a side of God you may have forgotten.
He loves YOU.
He cares for YOU.
He has plans to use YOU on this earth.
His love for YOU transcends your love for Him.
That means it goes way beyond anything you can imagine!
God’s View of Us!
Do you remember when you were young, how you thought and wondered about yourself?
- I think we all remember looking in the mirror and wondering — “Are we cute enough, thin enough, smart enough – or are my ears too big?” (Interesting thought isn’t it — the idea of enough?)
- Or we’d see through the eyes of our friends — “Do they like us? Are we popular? Did they avoid us yesterday?”
- Or we’d remember that “thing” we did or the “way” we acted out. And it would replay in our heads, over and over.
We start believing there’s no other way to feel about ourselves or to make progress in life — but to see ourselves through our own or another’s eyes.
But there is a better way!
Romans 5:8 says,
“But God demonstrates His own love toward us,
in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.
And this next verse is foundational for that one.
“For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life. John 3:16
Pay attention to them.
We usually pay attention to what God did, but look at why He did it!
Now read them again.
Do you hear it? —> It’s because of His great LOVE.
- We often think of God’s power and sacrifice — but it can be easy to miss that we are the object of His LOVE
- We are the recipients of His grace & mercy! You are! Notice it says “while we were yet sinners” and “we shall not perish.” You don’t have to get it all right. That’s MERCY and GRACE at work.
So… what do these verses say about YOU?
Do they say there is a qualification for God’s love?
That you have to measure up?
Or be perfect, or cute enough or smart enough – or have the right sized ears?
He simply says He loves you, even if you did the unimaginable.
No qualification. God offers His Son for you. That’s it!
His only requirement is that you believe.
Sit At Jesus’ Feet
Picture God’s focus on you and His love for you in these verses. It’s an amazing love someone must have in order to sacrifice for another person — especially for someone who’s wronged them.
And – if you have children, you know what it feels like to love them deeply — even when they ignore or hurt you. God wants you to realize His love for YOU is that unconditional!
The best part is that when you begin to see and believe these truths, it becomes your goal to abide in Christ!
In his book, Kingdom Woman, Tony Evans paints a great picture of living for Christ.
“The very things Martha was doing for Jesus distracted her from Jesus…she had become so involved in them that she excluded herself from time with Christ…..in your personal life as a kingdom woman, it is essential to note that in the good things of life, you should try not to lose the important things.“
We were called to be like Mary sitting at Jesus’ feet, yet we still have the jobs of Martha to be busy about — being a keeper at home — managing our life — and loving our family well — but to do that well, we’ve got to make time to sit at Jesus’ feet.
You’ve got to stop here and there in your day – even if it’s for a minute to whisper a prayer for sanity or for wisdom or direction — to ask him to help you take your thoughts captive, to discover what’s truly in your heart.
Sure there will be days when you hit the ground running and fall in bed without a minute to spare. But, think again.
Can you whisper that prayer while you’re brushing your teeth or your hair?
How about when you’re waiting in line for take out.
How about we make it our goal to talk with God any moment we can?
Maybe put a post-it note in a few places to help you remember?
Purpose & Passion
Okay…so we’ve determined that God loves us a great, great deal.
But…do you have days where you wonder what your purpose is?
It seems the whole world is talking about “finding your purpose” and “discovering your passion” — and it seems to make sense, right?
But then you wake to another day of feeding the kids, helping with their schoolwork, and running another load of laundry. I’m sure it makes you want to stake your claim in front of Netflix for whatever series has caught your attention this month — complete with chocolate!
And you wonder how passion and purpose measure up with what you read in the Bible?
But there are answers, really, there are!
God tells you throughout His word that He loves and values you, He desires a relationship with you, and He protects you. Plus a lot more!
And believe it or not, that truly is enough to get you through the day
— IF you let it seep into your soul
— IF you allow your thoughts to gain control over the nagging feeling you get when people you know seem so. much. more. in charge of their life.
Social media is so good at that, isn’t it?
That’s why it’s so important to take even five minutes to read God’s word. To let your mind slip away from what’s right in front of you — to a place of comfort and foundation in God.
Because, you know, it’s the only foundation that matters.
God tells us, everything else is sinking sand.
From there, you’ll gain that confidence we talked about earlier. And your passion and purpose will flow out of it!
Birds & Hair
So let’s look at another verse.
Are not five sparrows sold for two pennies?
And not one of them is forgotten before God.
Why, even the hairs of your head are all numbered.
Fear not; you are of more value than many sparrows.
In Bible times, a sparrow was used for sacrifices in the temple and was of such little value they cost less than a half-penny each. Even at that price, the sparrow isn’t forgotten by God!
Now – add in the amazing fact that every hair on your head is counted by God.
The Bible talking about hair might seem insignificant, but if you have kids, you loved those velvet locks at the back of your baby’s neck. But then remember the disappointment when that annoying bald spot started to appear as they’d turn their head back and forth and rub it off on their beds? Yah, such a bummer!
And then there’s discouragement you feel when the post-pregnancy hair loss happens you know, at around four months— then you know that every hair is a really. big. deal!
In a way this verse says that God understands. He notices every hair (or lack thereof) on our head!
So sparrows aren’t forgotten. Hair is numbered. And even better?
The last line of the verse says we can be certain that we have more value than many sparrows. I’m guessing you’re glad of that 😉 but…get this detail — if He notices when a lowly sparrow or a single hair falls to the ground, how much more does He notice your life and what occurs in your day?
It’s important to realize how great God’s love and devotion is to all of His creation. From the smallest creation and event — all the way to you!
You & Your Work Are Worth It!
As we wind up, my hope is that the next time you question your value — you’ll run it through the filter of God‘s word.
I believe you’ll discover that in God’s eyes, you are worth it — even if you’re not living up to what you consider your potential or someone else’s idea of your potential.
And the best part? When you know God’s immense love, you’ll stand taller and look more keenly to Him to determine your worth and work and value.
And, for those times when you wonder if your work is worth the time spent or if the money or energy is spent in the best ways — filter them through God’s word.
I hope you’re convinced it’s where you’ll find the wisdom to discern it’s value to God.
- Is it doing good in your family life? Or in the world?
- Is it advancing the Kingdom?
- Just like the women throughout history, you’re going to need discernment!
Maybe even more important — with the voices of the world in our pocket every hour of every day — it’s much harder to escape into our own backyard, so to speak.
So the need is pressing for you to filter what you hear.
Remember — the culture will convince you that what you do for yourself, what you like, what makes you feel good, and what it says is best for you — is most valuable.
BUT like the example of Martha, those things might not be God’s best — and they can take away from the things God says are extremely valuable.
Here’s an idea for how to apply what you heard here:
- Jot down how you can see how God values you — and how He created you. Write it out in your own words based on the verses here.
- List out a few things you know you can do with your gifts and talents to serve Him. It might be something simple like telling your child they did a great job today or texting a note of encouragement to someone you love.
Best of all, it will help you get a glimpse of how God and His word are your framework and foundation for worth and worthiness in all of life!
And because your family is your most important responsibility this side of heaven, you’ll be able to pass that worth onto your husband and kids!
I pray this post will build your confidence to live above the noise — so you can do great work right where God has you!
Maybe it will cause you to think twice when you clean out your hairbrush! :)
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