How To Live Out “Till Death Do Us Part?”
If you prefer to read, here’s the podcast in blog post form! ⤵️
This episode will encourage you to rethink your view of frustrations in your marriage.
Paul says it’s important for me to remind you, to instruct you to love you husband. And that’s a pretty broad category – but we’ll focus on reframing our thoughts and attitudes — and how doing that gets reflected in our actions.
- You’ll see how I went from living in my present disappointment to reframing my thoughts and actions to a more godly one. It was one of those moments where life, as we desire it, and reality collide to create one of life’s many lessons.
- God has a way of causing you to reconsider your perspective. If you’re open to His prompting.
- Marriage isn’t something we should tiptoe into hoping it will all work out. For a marriage to last a lifetime, we need help to get our actions to line up with God’s Word. It isn’t something that feelings and hormones will keep intact over the long haul.
- Marriage is a long term gig – one we will need “Slow growth with long term benefits!”
Listen in as we discuss tools for reframing your present dissappointments and frustrations in marriage!
Time to Think:
What if you end a battle or a tough conversation with a calm response stated in love for the other person?
What if you offer a kind and gentle response like:
- “I’m sorry I said what I did. I will honestly try harder next time.”
- “I let you down. Will you give me a chance to make it right?”
- “I’m sorry I’ve been ignoring you. I thought maybe you needed time alone, but now I see it made you feel alienated and like I don’t care.”
- “I’m sorry I let my anger get the best of me. It’s becoming a habit and I need to talk through things before they build resentment in me.”
So what do our bad habits — our “negatives” — teach you?
How can you turn them into ‘positives’?
- Seek God for help to stop “dripping.” It will be deeply personal for each one of us.
- Soul search for ways to stop all the “shoulds” – plus stop trying to get your husband to get it all together!
- Help your husbands understand you (my husband reminds me that he’s not a mind reader), not convict them of how non-understanding they are.
- And most importantly – accept your lack, those “negatives” in our life. Don’t be afraid of them and shove them aside. Use them to learn what God wants of you. Let them humble and bring you to repentance.
Words to Remember:
- Traditional Wedding Vows: “In the name of God, I, ___, take you, ___, to be my wife/husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, until parted by death. This is my solemn vow.”
Terry Covey @ Living Above the Noise:
- “Our weakness, our sin, our lack. And yet, if we let them, they can inspire us, or yank us, as the case may be, out of our stupor and into change.”
- “The keys to the Kingdom are found in Christ. And Christ can only be found through repentance. And repentance can only be born from humility.”
- “The to do’s in our Christian life and marriage must stem from our humility and the knowledge of our own lack; not from humbling our husband or revealing his lack. And certainly not from the long list of “shoulds” we’ve been patterned to adopt so we can feel like we’ve arrived.”
- “We need to help our husbands understand our multifaceted nature–and offer a bit of grace in the process.”
- “Each time I started dripping, Art was trying to quickly clean up the mess. But the dripping continued and he was getting weary with the constant return of the puddles. Finally, he started to shut down and tried to turn off the water supply. He felt he couldn’t say anything right, so the safest thing to do would be to not talk at all. The water was eroding the foundation of our marriage. Time to call the plumber. We indeed had problems.” Pg. 81. – Capture His Heart – Lysa TerKeurst
Bible Verses Cited:
‘For I know the plans that I have for you, ‘declares the Lord, ‘plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon Me and come and pray to Me, and I will listen to you. You will seek Me and find Me when you search for Me with all your heart.” Jeremiah 29 11-13
“Whoever exalts himself shall be humbled; and whoever humbles himself shall be exalted.” Matthew 23:12
“You shall love your neighbor as yourself.” Matthew 22:39
“Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility consider one another as more important than yourselves.” Philippians 2:3
The contentions of a wife are a constant dripping. Proverbs 19:13
“You husbands in the same way, live with your wives in an understanding way, as with [a]someone weaker, since she is a woman; and show her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers will not be hindered.” 1 Peter 3:7
Capture His Heart by Lysa TerKeurst
Goodbyes & Good Boundaries by Lysa TerKeurst
My “Think – Pray – Plan – Do Planner” (T.P.P.D) is —> Coming Soon on Amazon!
Download the Think – Pray – Plan – Do pdf here.
- Think about all you heard today. The thoughts and questions and dreams and ideals you have.
- Pray about those to determine what’s most important and valuable.
- Make a Plan to implement those beliefs and values. Write them on a white board or get them printed on a wall hanging. The most important thing is to put them in front of you so you won’t forget them. So you can implement them daily and discuss them over dinner or when you need to discipline a child. Or make decisions with your husband.
- Do! Live them out. Make them your reality. And then watch as your family life transforms as you and your family gain the morale and confidence and trust in God’s plan for your family!
Find Living Above the Noise Podcasts here: